How many of us find ourselves in familiar situations when it is hard for us to say no, or we become defensive, or overcompensate in some way?
We can find ourselves in repeated situations with certain people which make us feel uncomfortable each time we meet and interact with them, promising ourselves that next time we will respond in a different way, yet when we next interact with them nothing changes. Many of us live our lives in this way, without choosing to understand why the repeated behaviours happen. Transactional Analysis (TA) can help, is a helpful way of better understanding our relationships today through exploring our three Ego States; learning for ourselves how we are responding as we interact with others in different situations.
Understanding our Ego States enables each of us to see how we have become the person we are, how we have learnt to build relationships and to communicate with others in our lives. Understanding our Ego States and those of others, gives us the capacity to see more clearly how others interact with us, what response they invite from us as we hear what is said, done or believe we understand what the other is thinking.
TA also uses a life script, which in turn helps us to see and understand our repeated patterns of thinking, feeling and behaviours as they are the means by which we were taught to survive as children, and whilst they worked for us as children, they no longer work for us as adults, they prevent us being who we can be today in relationships with others and as ourselves.
The aim of TA is to strengthen the Adult Ego state, leading to autonomy in the here and now, giving each of us the capacity to be real and fully present in all situations. Do get in touch if you would like to explore your script and why repeated ways of being are happening for you.